Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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