Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
