My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
