Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
