So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize