Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
My pussy is not your playground.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
