Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
