he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Dicks are not precious.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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