I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
