Rock
Scissors
Fuck
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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