So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize