id be glad to
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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