enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
