Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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