everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
