How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Randomize
