Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
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