i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I just blew my weed a kiss
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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