Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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