I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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