I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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