non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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