so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
