eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
