she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I love you. Go after that dick
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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