That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
