Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Barsexuality is the new black.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
