this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
