The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
