Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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