I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Randomize
