come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
