More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
