We won't sleep together?
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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