i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
