You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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