they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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