So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
drinking out of a sandbucket again
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
