If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
there is puke in my bra ... again
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