Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
