it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize