if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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