he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
