she looked like the bat from fern gully.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
