so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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