3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Randomize