Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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