so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
