That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
