barbara walters just said penis...
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
