Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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